Israel, country of (un)organized chaos, of milk and honey, of aaaaaaaargh, of ooooooooh, of OMG, of WT…!
Israel will always awake various emotions, as there are so many different aspects that build a person’s visit to the country that never sleeps!
Every day is different and adventurous! Why? Because its inhabitants NEED and LOVE to feel they’re alive and kicking! That every day should be lived as if it were the first and the last!
But tourists that visit Israel are not Israeli in their mind and heart (yet) and I therefore take the liberty of describing a list of situations that may occur when setting a foot in an Israeli hotel:
Don’t be shocked if the waitress or the waiter approaches you by screaming “hi guys” or by calling you “mami”, “hamuda” (sweetie), “neshama sheli” (my soul). This is a standard procedure which is also bound to happen in banks, restaurants, supermarkets, cabs, shops, etc..
There is a big chance she or he might even sit next to you to take your order and chat away to get to know you a little. The conversation might soon be shared with the neighboring tables, the barman, the cleaning lady, the manager, the receptionist and everyone who might just happen to be around.
When leaving the hotel, you will know the first name of most of the hotel staff, as well as their family history, dreams, political views, salary and wishes.
Don’t start crying if the family history and political views are told to you in “scream-mode”. No, they’re not angry at you, they’re not fighting with you: this is the way Israelis tend to express themselves.
They also tend to make a grand and loud entrance whenever they set foot somewhere.
Most Israelis have an incredible ability to multitask: they talk on their cellphone while whatsapping, sharing a picture on Instagram or/and Facebook, ordering on Asos/AliExpress, and even talking to you. Coughing will not help if you want their full attention, so count to three and shout their first name.
Beware that when you order something to eat in Israel, you will always get too much food on your plate as “one never knows what may happen tomorrow”.
There is a lack of water in this country but, contrary to beer (5,50-6 Euros), tap water is the only beverage that will be served to you for free.
Breakfasts can be ordered the entire day. Yes, yes, even at 23:54.
Don’t keep everything bubbled up if you don’t agree with something or someone. Get it out of your system as this is expected from you. Once you’ll make your point like a true Israeli, a sense of unknown pride will take over your entire body and soul and you will feel like the King or Queen of the world.
Even if you’re sitting in the garden of a hotel having a nice cup of tea in March, do not forget to put on sunscreen as you might get sunburnt.
Always bring a little jacket with you because although the weather is boiling hot, hotel lobbies are usually as cold as a freezing refrigerator.
The weekend in Israel starts on Thursday evening and ends on Saturday evening. So, keep this golden rule in mind: most shops are closed on Saturday because of Shabbat!
Meetings and rendez-vous never start on time: 9:00 usually means 9:30, 20:00 usually means 21:00.
Don’t be astonished if the person you’re supposed to meet in the lobby does not wear a tie because of the boiling weather but proudly exhibits pilgrim sandals which you may have seen for the first time at an exhibition on ancient biblical times.
The kings of this country in the summer are cockroaches so don’t get hysterical if you see them having an evening stroll or a morning run in the hotel garden.
Bear in mind that the bill does not include service and that it is totally normal for your waiter or waitress to decorate the document with little pink hearts at the “Service not included” section. Tips usually vary between 10 to 15 % of the total amount.
Believe it or not but the lobby of a hotel can be a true haven of peace in this lovely but hectic country. Most people usually tend to spend their time off in cafés and haven’t really discovered the magical powers of these enchanted islands.
So, what have we learned today? That visiting a lobby in an Israeli hotel can be an unforgettable (anthropological) experience and broaden your mind towards different cultures and mindsets.
To have a joyful and fun experience, it is of utmost importance to realize that Israelis love everything and everyone which is unknown to them. You will discover that although they may sometimes have a pushy way to show their interest, they are truly good and caring people.
David Ben Gurion said: In Israel, in order to be a realist, you must believe in miracles. And Israelis really believe they can fly and that the sky is the limit!
Israel can be compared to an adolescent who is still looking for its marks as it is a relatively young country which will celebrate its 70th anniversary next year. I know it is keenly looking forward to celebrating its birthday with you in all the amazing love, care, charm and smiles it has and can offer!
So, what are you waiting for? Book that plane ticket and I will be very happy to suggest top Israeli hotel lobbies to you!